If I claim I died in 2013 on my tax return and they check into it I can just say "it was on the inside."
— Aaron Hertzog (@aaronhertzog) February 21, 2014
Girl, are you made from an artificial sweetener? Because you give me a severe headache and I associate you with my own body image issues.
— Tim Butterly (@timbutterly) February 24, 2014
Hey, any movie ad referring to the film as a "major motion picture", who are you really trying to convince?
— Jim Grammond (@jgrammond) February 24, 2014
A reward? Nah. A handsome reward? I'm listening.
— Mary Radzinski (@MaryRadzinski) February 28, 2014
This documentary on the Manson Family murders really makes me think twice about wanting to be a beautiful actress.
— Chip Chantry (@ChipChantry) February 27, 2014
A sewage main burst in London has left parts of the city flooded with human waste. Or as British people call it, "Americans."
— Alison (@Alison_lynnZ) February 28, 2014
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